Sanctuaries

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I gave him
my most precious sanctuaries

Not the bright rooms

Not the ones
where I laugh
pour coffee
answer the world
with my shoulders back

I gave him
the hidden rooms

The rooms
with no windows

The rooms
where I take off my name

And become only breath
only woman
only trembling

I gave him
the bed
where I vanish
from everyone

The silence
where I confess
without language

The body
I had spent years
calling back
from the dead

And he entered
softly

Almost reverently

As if some part of him
recognized
the altar

As if his hands
knew enough
to lower their voice

He knows reverence

That is what hurts

Then he left

And spoke to me

Of work

Of home

Of all the ordinary lives
waiting for him
outside my door

And I stood there
inside the room
he had already abandoned

Holding the ruins
of my own tenderness

Wondering
how a man
could enter a sanctuary

And not know
he had been kneeling

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